Dear Pieter van den Hoogenband,

For a 30-year-old, you’re not a bad swimmer.  But you lost the only event you were competing in.  You lost, Hoogie.  You lost.
You didn’t break my heart, though.  I thank you for that.
You do have the best name in the history of all names ever, so you win the gold medal in that.

I love you, Hoogie.  Always and forever.

Yours truly,
Hena

Dear Michael Phelps,

HOLY FUCKING SHIT you are the most insanely amazingly athletic person in the whole world.

I hope Disney makes a movie about you.  You are America’s pride and joy.  Thank you for existing and pwning everyone in sight.

Love,
Hena

I never got around to writing about Season 4 of Doctor Who, but that’s not going to stop me from showing you all my awesome new Sonic Screwdriver.

This is probably the greatest thing to hit the internets.  Thank you, internets, for creating the RickRoll, and thank you, hmatkin, for creating this video.

OBAMA 08 AMIRITE?????